The Romantasy Therapist

Actor Monica Bellucci and director Tim Burton have apparently split after a relationship lasting two to three years. The length of their relationship may be significant, as this is as long as the so-called Honeymoon Period of relationships normally lasts. Beyond this, reality – and disappointment – kicks in, and relationships either transition into more mature and lasting love or the couple split.

During the Honeymoon Period, couples feel intense attraction, euphoria and extreme interest in each other caused by “feel-good” hormones which blind us to our partner’s flaws and cause a kind of extreme infatuation. Couples usually have a lot of sex and try to be together as much as possible. However, being together a great deal can shorten the Honeymoon Period, as it is nature’s way of making us bond. Any kind of commitment can end it. This includes moving in together or pseudo-cohabitation where partners are staying over together most nights. Taking things more slowly can keep the early passion alive for longer. Even then, the early relationship hormones will still wear off before the couple’s third anniversary.

Some couples don’t realise that hormones contribute so much to their early relationship and fear that something is wrong, either splitting up or seeking ways to restore their extreme ardour. Those who recognise that relationships change are more able to negotiate the differences in their feelings as time passes, appreciating that their new connection is more realistic but deeper and more lasting.

Living apart

It may be that Tim Burton knows a thing or two about keeping the honeymoon hormones active, as he and Monica Bellucci didn’t live together. Burton has lived apart from partners in the past. Notably, the large Oxfordshire home he bought with Helena Bonham-Carter was split into two separate dwellings. Burton’s décor wouldn’t have been out of place in Kaylie Smith’s Phantasma, while Bonham-Carter’s share was beautiful and more conventional. Their choice to indulge their personal preferences separately may have contributed to the relationship’s success for many years.TRT